Mother’s Day

I’m probably supposed to be thinking about my own mother and not myself on Mother’s Day, but I’ve had my kid and our relationship on my brain a lot this weekend. I’m a mom. That’s bananas. (Unrelated note: you capitalize Mom when you’re using it as someone’s name, as in, “Hi, Mom!” but leave it lowercase when using it as a noun that’s not proper, like “My mom came to my house.” I know we’re all adults and you probably already know that, but the amount of people who don’t bothers me.)

In so many ways, I don’t at all feel different. I’ve heard many people remark, “I don’t even remember what life was like before I became a mom!” …really? Are you just saying that because you think you’re supposed to or are you grossly exaggerating? Because I remember– life was so much easier! I remember having worries, but what were they about?!

But, obviously, I feel super different, though not in ways that can be greatly articulated. I’m more patient with my son than I ever knew I had the capacity to be. He’s here, and it’s like, “Well this makes sense.” I remember thinking a few weeks after he was born, “I have two arms, two legs, one son,” like he’s a part of me just as my hair or kneecaps are. I wasn’t a person who always knew she would be a mother. Early on in adulthood, I was very anti-procreating. Then I got sort of ambivalent about it, then I met someone who would make a great partner and biology took over and I needed a baby now. Now that I’ve met that baby, of course I’m his mother- it’s the most logical thing in the world.

And moms are, like, amazing. That adjective is heinously overused, but so appropriate to use when you sit back in amazement over the sheer amount of things we can accomplish. Physically, emotionally– the mental load moms are capable of carrying could cure this world of everything that ails it. [I’m not saying dads are terrible or that parents or guardians who don’t identify as mothers are any less amazing. Lifting up one doesn’t automatically negate any others!]

So Happy Mother’s Day, friends. Whether you think it’s a dumb Hallmark holiday or are grieving because your mom has passed or will be celebrating with Momosas all day, I’ll be thinking of you. Happy first Mother’s Day, real Natalie (and the katrillion other people I know who popped out babies since last May.)